JOKE,HAHA.......^--^

丫頭 · 發表於 2006-3-17 14:40

為提高你的英語水平,請先看英語,再看中文翻譯~~~~

Two Birds 兩隻鳥

  Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?

  Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.

  Teacher: Please tell us.

  Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.

  兩隻鳥

  老師：這兒有兩隻鳥，一隻是麻雀。誰能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀嗎？
  學生：我指不出，但我知道答案。
  老師：請說說看。
  學生：燕子旁邊的就是麻雀，麻雀旁邊的就是燕子。

Two Pigs 兩頭豬

「What makes more noise than a pig in the sty？」
「Two pigs．」

「豬圈裡什麼東西會比一頭豬鬧出更大的聲音來？」
「兩頭豬。」

Stupid Question

  Dan was the doorman of a club in a big city． Every day，thousands of people passed his door， and a lot of them stopped and said to him，"What's the time， please?"
  After a few months, Dan said to himself，"I'm not going to answer all those stupid people any more．I'm going to go to a shop and buy a big clock．Then I'm going to put it up on the wall here．" He bought a clock and put it up on the wall．
  "Now people aren't going to stop and ask me the time，" he said happily． But after that， a lot of people stopped everyday,looked at the clock and then said to Dan，"Is that clock right?"

愚蠢的問題

  丹在一個大城市的某個俱樂部當守門人。每天，有數千人經過他的門口。其中許多人停下來問他：「請問，現在幾點？」
  幾個月後，丹自言自語：「我不想再回答這些蠢人提出的問題了。我要去商店買一隻大鐘。然後把它掛在這兒的牆上。」他買了一隻鍾，把它掛在了牆上。
  「現在人們不會再停下來問我時間了。」他快活地說。可是打那以後，每天許多人都停下來，看看鐘，然後問丹：「這鐘准嗎？」

丫頭 · 發表於 2006-3-17 14:41

My Wife Will Exchange Them

A gentleman walks into a store and asked for a pair of gloves.
　　"Cloth or leathert" asked the salesperson.
　　"Makes no difference. "replied customer.
　　"What color?" asked the clerk.
　　"Any." he responded.
　　"Size?"
　　"Give me whatever you prefer," the gentleman said slightly exasperated. "My wife will be back tomorrow to exchange them."

　　反正我太太明天會來換的

　　一位先生走進一家商店要買副手套。
　　「您是要布的還是皮的？」售貨員問。
　　「沒什麼區別。」這位顧客回答。
　　「那您要什麼顏色的呢？」售貨員又問。
　　「什麼顏色都成。」他回答。
　　「號碼呢？」
　　「您就隨便給我拿一副吧，」這位顧客有點不耐煩了，「反正我太太明天都會來換的。」

When was Rome built　

Teacher: When was Rome built?
Tom: At night.
Teacher: Who told you that?
Tom: You did. You said Rome wasn't built in a day.

羅馬是什麼時候建成的？

　　教師：羅馬是什麼時候建成的？
　　湯姆：夜裡。
　　教師：你跟你這麼說的？
　　湯姆：是您。您說過羅馬不是在一個白天建成的。

Note：
　　Rome wasn't built in a day. [諺語]羅馬城非朝夕建成;偉業非一日之功。
　　All roads lead to Rome. [諺]條條大路通羅馬;殊途同歸。

The New Teacher 新老師

  George comes from school on the first of September.

  "George, how did you like your new teacher?" asked his mother.

  "I didn't like her, Mother, because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six too....."

  新老師

  9月1日，喬治放學回到家裡。
  "喬治，你喜歡你們的新老師嗎？" 媽媽問。
  "媽媽，我不喜歡，因為她說3加3得6, 可後來又說2加4也得6。"