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Today certain is not my day. Just couple minutes ago, I wrote a long page about my morning. And then, the internet got some problem or something, the whole thing was just gone. It was great. I couldn't even find a word of what I just wrote. Now I have to rewrite it. This is just prefect. I love it, just as how I love standing in the rain trying to clam myself down. It was bs. I missed the stupid math test on friday because I had a bad headache and didn't go see the doctor and therefore, I have no documentation for the coordinator that says "cara was too sick to take the exam". Right now, there's two road I could take: either listen to the coordinator drop the idiotic course and retake it next sememster, or score all A's for the rest of the smemester. Which road do you think I am going to take? Before you say a thing, let me tell you the story first.
On friday, I had a headache and missed the exam. Later I went to see my professor, and she left early. So, the only thing I could do was to email her. And then she emailed the coordinator, and the coordinator emailed me. However, I was so busy that day that I didn't have a chance to check my mail until late at night. I tried to tell my story through the internet to the coordinator, but I didn't how to make him believe me. My headache is kindda an old problem. I guess all of you known science is the one and only explainaiton westerners could accept; and my headache in a way, could not be understand in the westerners' way of thinking. So, I waited 'til monday to talked to my professor and emailed the coordinator. Well, he asked me to see him today, so I went.
In his office, he kept saying "you should have known this, you should have known that". well, F it. None of my friends know any of the "you should have known". I didn't even known his existence until my professor told me. I tried to tell him I have no idea about the "you should have known", but he just cut me off with the "you should have known". He also told me the best thing I could do is to drop the course and retake it because it needs all A's for the rest of the course the make up the grade. For that fifth grade math, do I have to waste a semester and risk the chance of getting into the School of Business? It was a joke that I signed up this class in the first place. Now that he hinted me that I am one of those American math dummies. I was so mad and feeling so wronged and helpless. Tears came like the ocean waves. I tried so hard to hold them back. But the best I could do was to not let them fall out of my eyes. I did it, and, after I left the coordinator's office, a woman asked me if I need a tissue. Jesus, I almost lost control. I rejeceted her, went to the balcony just out side of the math department, turned on the CD player, and stood there try to clam myself down. Well, I wasn't that good in controling my own emotion. Five big drops of tears rolled down my cheek. One got to my lip. It was salty, and a bit of bitter. It had been the longest time that I had tasted the tear. Well, anyway, I am one of those pessimism idoit. Ten minutes later, I was calling my friends for lunch because the math department is just right across from their dorms. I told my girl friend that I cried with a smile while we were waiting for another friend. It's the first time she hear any sadness from me since the first day we met. Anyway, this "I cried" thing will be around by dinner time. Well, I don't care. They all know my story. First part, at least.
Opps, it looks like I got off topic. Well, it's worth it. This is my first big story in college. It's something to remember. |
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