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New Definitions Make Sense!

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有過貢獻的斑竹

留學博士后(十二級)

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意浮 發表於 2005-8-6 05:01 | 只看該作者 回帖獎勵 |倒序瀏覽 |閱讀模式
Some of these new definitions make sense!
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Just received Oxford Dictionary's latest definition of the following words.  Please update your online dictionary :

Definitions

Divorce : Future tense of marriage.

Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water power...

Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.

Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read.

Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

Yawn : The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

Etc. : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

Committee : Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

Experience : The name men give to their mistakes.

Diplomat : A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.

Opportunist : A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.

Father : A banker provided by nature.

Criminal : A guy no different from the rest....except that he got caught.

Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.

Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.
意猶未盡,浮想聯翩。

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bluepolish 發表於 2005-8-9 19:12 | 只看該作者
very interesting definition, i will forward this to my friends with text msg.
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