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不知道為什麼,我一直相信,愛情只是一個人的事情。
一路走來,看過花開花落,只知道愛情與時間無關,與距離無關;只是固執地相信愛情產生於瞬間,只是固執地認為那是一份與他人無關的絕對隱私。愛就愛了,不要管現在將來,甚至不必去理會對手與對白。愛是一幕獨角戲,我們自導自演。
曾經,我們一個人,背著感情的包袱走了很多年,一直想找個人把它卸下來。但是我們一定要讓那個人知道,這不是隨便給的,他必須知道這是一份饋贈。
或許上天希望我們改變初衷,於是某年某月某一天,在某條必經的路上,我們會遇見某個人。然後我們就固執地把他當成一棵樹,要往他青翠的樹榦上,刻下我們心裡所有的秘密和過往的傷痕。
曾經的憂慮、懷疑和防備,在見到他的瞬間會慢慢溶化。那種細微的感動是從前不曾體會的。那種感激就好象在茫茫的沙漠上跋涉,突然發現一眼彎彎的月牙泉。不多也不少,不早也不晚,它就在那時出現。
於是,我們幾乎忘了,忘了我們曾經說過,愛情是一個人的遊戲。夜深的時候,安靜得只能聽見自己的心跳。我伸出手,觸摸無盡的夜色。夜色溫柔,彷彿醇酒。恍惚中,差點以為,邁一步就是地老天荒。
曾經陌生的兩個人,可以讓情慾肆意奔流,希望能到達彼此靈魂的深處。可這世界是個透明的瓶子,向左走,向右走,依然找不到瓶口。
於是,我笑我自己,總是弄錯了主題。開始本來就不一定有結局,而關於愛情沒有蒙太奇。
依然相信愛情,相信愛情只是一個人的事。愛是生命中每一次感動和傷痛,愛是歲月中無法磨滅的年輪。生命是場幻覺,而愛是夢醒時分。
愛情,一個人的故事,它只是你心裡的感覺,跟其他任何人無關。愛情,來了就來了,走了就走了,讓它來去從容。愛情只是我們關於生命思考的出口,絕不是救贖的全部理由。
所以,當我們學會了愛自己,愛愛情的時候,就會明白,愛情永遠只是一個人的事情。
LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT
Wislawa Szymborska
They』re both convinced
that a sudden passion joined them.
Such certainty is more beautiful,
but uncertainty is more beautiful still.
Since they』d never met before, they』re sure
that there』d been nothing between them.
But what』s the word from the streets, staircases, hallways--
perhaps they』ve passed by each other a million times?
I want to ask them
if they don』t remember--
a moment face to face
in some revolving door?
perhaps a 「sorry「 muttered in a crowd?
a curt 「wrong number「caught in the receiver?--
but I know the answer.
No, they don』t remember.
They』d be amazed to hear
that Chance has been toying with them
now for years.
Not quite ready yet
to become their Destiny,
it pushed them close, drove them apart,
it barred their path,
stifling a laugh,
and then leaped aside.
There were signs and signals,
even if they couldn』t read them yet.
Perhaps three years ago
or just last Tuesday
a certain leaf fluttered
from one shoulder to another?
Something was dropped and then picked up.
Who knows, maybe the ball that vanished
into childhood』s thicket?
There were doorknobs and doorbells
where one touch had covered another
beforehand.
Suitcases checked and standing side by side.
One night. perhaps, the same dream,
grown hazy by morning.
Every beginning
is only a sequel, after all,
and the book of events
is always open halfway through.
越來越長的沉默,
卻溶解不了你的生活
面對遲遲不能夠兌現的承諾
其實我也惶恐
雖然你始終不說
早已看透謊言的背後
但你默默保護著將滅的燈火
一些我們做的夢
怎麼告訴你,現實有太多的壓力
什麼時候才能帶你四處旅行
夢想已顯的不清醒
你就象你依然美麗握住我的手心
怎麼告訴你,未來有太多不確定
改變命運好象得需要奇迹
親愛的,對不起。有些事我不得不騙你。
親愛的,對不起。有些事我不得不放棄。
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