'白宮扔屎橛表演會',它曾經的正式名稱是 Presidential Press Conference,但又被簡稱作'Presser' - '擠屎會'。這是一個形象化的綽號,因為傳統意義上的Press Conference是總統先生在上面作大便乾燥狀,常常只放空屁,實(屎)質性的內容卻不見出來。記者們呢,就只好在下面猛勁兒地擠 - press,擠來擠去的,就把記者們真正想要的乾貨擠出來了。
這一次的Presser,記者們還是準備著照往常的模式,大家一起努力,幫總統把屎擠出來。但是誰也沒有想到,還沒等他們開擠,總統就劈頭蓋腦天公散屎一般把屎橛子向他們砸過來,而且那完全不是他們想要擠出來的屎,而是一灘灘一坨坨的臭狗屎 - 他們集體被總統給狗屎了,'敵對勢力'、'人民公敵'、'妖言惑眾'、'廢坷牛屎',每一條屎橛上都附有標籤,屎橛把這些標籤牢牢地黏在他們身上。一個多小時之後,記者們灰溜溜離開白宮,一頭屎一身尿,手裡卻沒有哪怕一小橛他們本想擠出來的屎。
FOX News的記者還算好,他們向來對總統恭敬有加,即便是擠屎也常常不用手而是直接用嘴,屎橛也就沒有直接向他們砸來,很幸運!但也還是免不了濺了一身一臉的屎尿星子。
坐鎮在FOX播音室的主持Shepard Smith先生憋不住了,怒氣沖沖大放厥詞:
「It's absolutely crazy. He keeps repeating ridiculous throwaway lines that are not true at all and sort of avoiding this issue of Russia as if we're some kind of fools for asking the question. Really? Your opposition was hacked and the Russians were responsible for it and your people were on the phone with Russia on the same day it was happening and we're fools for asking the questions? 」
然後他竟敢開始對總統咄咄逼人:
「No, sir, we're not fools for asking these questions and we demand to know the answer to this question. You owe this to the American people. Your supporters will support you either way. If your people were on the phone with -- what were they saying? We have a right to know. We absolutely do, and that you call us "fake news" and put us down like children for asking these questions on behalf of the American people, is inconsequential. The people deserve that answer, at very least. 」
石破天驚!一向為總統站樁墊腳敲鑼打鼓的FOX News,竟然冒出來如此不和諧的聲音。廣大川普人民群眾憤怒了,他們齊聲抗議,堅決要求FOX立刻開除Shepard Smith,否則就向FOX說拜拜。
屎橛子現在送到了FOX領導們的手裡。